Dong-Young's Love Story (Sad Version)

NOTIFICATION: THE FOLLOWING STORY IS COMPLETELY FICTIONAL. THE CONTENT OF THE STORY ISN'T CONNECTED TO REALISTIC CHARACTERS, STORIES, OR SETTINGS WHATSOEVER. EVEN IF YOU DO FIND ANY RESEMBLANCE, IT'S MERELY YOUR IMAGINATION.

It was raining. A beautiful couple did not even think of escaping from the rain. Wherever they went, whatever happened to them, nothing really mattered because they had each other. They walked all the way to the 'Han-River'…….



‘Sigh. Stupid book. What was I thinking-am I really going to follow the stupid scenario of this low rated romance fiction?’


Dong-Young thought to himself as he was waiting for his girlfriend near the han-river. He couldn’t believe the absurd plan he’d decided to carry out, all because his overtly dramatic friend, Hyung-Seok had advised him to do so. “The Midnight Drama by the Riverside of Han”. That was the name of the book Dong-Young was holding in his hands, and that was also the name of a top bestseller that’s been the “hot potato” among teenagers recently-the dramatic settings, characters, and mostly the plot attracted people who were wearisome over their mundane lives. And it was only two days before when Hyung-Seok had given Dong-Young this book and recommended him to “refer” to the content when going out with his girlfriend. Since poor Dong-Young had no prior experience of dating a girl-in fact, he’d never spoken to a creature of the other sex throughout the 17 years of his life (of course, his mom and sister being exceptions)-he had no other choice but to rely on the intelligence of the bestseller writer to guide him. (That being said, Hyung-Seok never meant that he should “literally trace” the story when he told him to refer, but sometimes Dong-Young just couldn’t catch the implied intentions of advices.)

Anyways, luckily, like in the book, it was raining near Han River. Everything was perfectly identical with the book’s story except for the presence of the boy’s lover.


‘Why is she so late? Have I just been dumped on my first date? Christ, she was the only girl who’d accepted me after 17 asking-outs; she’s the only chance I’ve got left to experience something that at least something that resembles “a romantic relationship”! No, that won’t happen. She’s probably just caught up with something. Maybe…… in a car accident? Oh hell, what am I thinking? She’s going to be here soon enough.’


And fortunately, Dong-Young’s hopes did not let him down. To his surprise, his girlfriend had actually showed up, dressed magnificently in a silk laced Y shirt and a black mini skirt. Her black glasses matched the color of her dark brown eyes and hair, and her sheer white skin created a vivid contrast that almost made her naturally glow in the dim and humid weather.

‘Wow. Is she real? Can this really be? She must be an angel, or I must be dreaming. I’d have been satisfied if I could hang out with someone who’s covered herself up with a skirt; she’s way too gorgeous!’


And it was true. Dong-Young’s girlfriend-let’s just say she’s K-was quite good looking for a high school girl. When she’d approached Dong-Young, our timid protagonist felt as if he was going to faint because of the overwhelming ecstasy K was making him experience.



“Hi! Sorry, am I late?”
“H..Hey! No…no…not at all! Wel..welcome!”



Dong-Young couldn’t believe the unbelievably awkward response he’d just made to the most casual greetings of his first girlfriend. “Shoot, darn it! Welcome? What do I mean by welcome? She’d think I was a waiter serving at a restaurant! I’m a total washout. I’ve got to take a look at my guidebook.” And so he did, only to find something even more preposterous than his situation right now.




The boy sang a song to the girl. Time passed so fast when they were together. An hour would pass when they thought only ten minutes have passed. They were afraid if they cannot hold this happiness forever.

“Nothing better…… Nothing better…..than youuuuuuuu oh oh owwhhhh…”

Dong-Young started to sing instantly as it was described in the book. He made his best effort to impress his girl, performing his repeatedly practiced favorite song, “Nothing Better” However, unexpectedly, an hour didn’t pass like ten minutes as it did in the story, and apparently nobody was happy at the weird silence he’d suddenly created.

“W…wow! Tha…That’s very impressive! Haha…”

K reluctantly complimented with a nervous smile. It was obvious she was startled and confused at her boyfriend’s eccentricity. Dong-Young had to do something, and he had to do it quickly.

‘Oh my god, stupid book! Why isn’t it making time fly? I got to follow the instructions in the next chapter.’



After staring deeply into each other's eyes and whispering to each other how one had missed the other for minutes did the boy realize that the girl's shirt was soaked, water dripping in a steady rhythm. "We'd better find somewhere to hide from the rain for now." The girl blushed at the thought of her dear boyfriend caring for her and agreed. The two,standing so close to each other that the 40 year old man at the convenience store a bit faraway regarded them as one, bulky person standing in the rain.



Dong-Young slowly approached his girlfriend and gently whispered in her ears,

“K…I’ve missed you so much… You wouldn’t be able to imagine how deeply I’m in love with you…”

Speaking in his excessively buttery tone, he fiercely gazed into her eyes as if he was going to assault her.

“Um… Dong-Young… It’s only the 2nd time you’ve met with me… Remember? I’m sorry, but could you back off a little?”

Now, K was conspicuously uncomfortable, or even a little afraid, with her date's idiosyncrasy.

‘What? What’s wrong? This is exactly the same as what’s happening in the story so far! Damn, why isn’t she happy? Oh well, whatever-I’m sticking to the plan.’

Because K’s shirt wasn’t soaked because of her umbrella, Dong-Young took her blue umbrella and threw it out of the way. Now, finally, the rain could make his partner wet and then turn everything back onto the romantic pace he’d originally planned.



“K! We’d better find somewhere to hide from the rain for now!”
“ARE YOU CRAZY? WHAT ARE YOU, TOTAL NUTS? Just give me the umbrella back!”
“Umm….No! I can’t! I’m not supposed to.”
“What do you mean, you’re not supposed to, you duschbag? For heaven’s sake, you’re the worst date I’ve ever met in my life! GIVE ME MY UMBRELLA BACK!”
“What? No, gosh, I shouldn’t, please understand! You’re not supposed to have an umbrella right now!”
“WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN? Oh my god, you’re completely insane, aren’t you? You psychopath! Never mind the umbrella, I’m going home!”



Then K angrily stomped off, heading for the subway station. Now, Dong-Young was totally perplexed and didn’t know what to do.

‘HELL, WHAT IS HER PROBLEM? No, I can’t let her go….. I need to get her back! My first date! I need to retrieve her!’



So Dong-Young started racing after his frustrated partner, yelling her to stop. K began to run, but Dong-Young was chasing her closer and closer by the moment.

“AARRGH! What the hell! He’s completely crazy! Help, someone help!”


Hearing her desperate call for rescue, a policeman who was patrolling nearby hurriedly raced over. Apparently, the policeman in his forties had been taking a break at a nearby convenience store.
‘And that’s supposed to be the man who was to watch us emerge as one? Get out of my way-I need to get my girl.’

Then Dong-Young punched the intruder’s jaw, which made him faint in pain. In case you didn’t know yet, Dong-Young had mastered Kung-Fu at the age of 5, being praised as a martial arts genius but further alienating females from him with his barbarism.

“Help! Help! A mad person is chasing me!”
“Oh, would you please shut up, K! Why wouldn’t you recognize my love?”
“Help! HELP! MOMMY, DADDY, PLEASE SAVE ME!!”
“Arrrgh… Sorry, K!”


In a desperate attempt to silence his shrieking lover and to adjust the situation as similar as possible to the book’s plot, he knocked her out with a blow.

‘Oh, oh, K! What have I done? Why did this all happen? I have no other option to keep up with the book’s instructions…. I’ll kill the author if this story isn’t a happy ending!’


The boy looked at the clock and it was already 3am. Both bus and subway were not available at that time. It would take too long for them to walk back to home. Afraid that the girl might catch a cold, the boy covered her with his body. The boy led the girl to a place with a ceiling, which could cover the rain. The girl leaned against the boy. Strangely enough, the girl fell asleep quite fast in such harsh environment. The boy looked at the girl's face and thought that nothing could be as pretty and innocent as her sleeping face.


Dong-Young looked at his watch. It was only half past midnight. So our patient protagonist waited a full two and a half hour until it was finally 3 AM. No means of transportation were available. He’d already put his coat over K’s body. She was already leaning against his shoulder, unconscious. And since she was unconscious, she surely was fast asleep even in her harsh environment. Finally, he already thought she was pretty and innocent as hell-dead serious. There was no question.



‘So…… What’s it going to be? What’s next? Do I finally get to kiss the bride and live happily ever after? What’s does it say in the next chapter?’

What the heck is the boy thinking! Is he a pervert? Well, what he was doing did make him a pervert. To become a normal person, he decided to wake her up and take her back “to her home, which was too far. So the boy decided to take her to a nearby inn. He rented two rooms and gave one to the girl. They said good night and slept. The boy was dreaming. In his dream, he was with his girlfriend again beside Han River. She was hiding her face deeply in between her knees. She was crying harshly, and trying her best not to show her face to her boyfriend. The boy asked, "What happened to you, sugar? Show me your face. Everything's fine." The girlfriend had the face of Mr. Garrioch. "What the...!" The girl said, "I'm so ugly.... So I went through plastic surgery to below! Do you hate me too if I'm Ugly?" He woke up, and thought about the dream again. Then, he decided he should love her, no matter how she looked like. We would be a loving couple forever! But she was so ugly can't nobody wants to love her just like one she wanted to be pretty, she wanted to be pretty....all alone all alone~

‘……………………………………’

The book’s title wasn’t “The Midnight Drama by the Riverside of Han” for nothing. The sudden twist in the story-the drastic shift from a romantic love story to comedies and farces-was what the bestseller “drama” was so renowned for. The author had magical talents at distorting serious stories into hilarious-or even ridiculous-comedies, and everyone enjoyed his satire towards incorrigible lovers. Of course, unfortunately, Dong-Young did not.


‘WHAT IS THIS? What just happened? Who’s Mr. Garrioch, and how am I supposed to make K look like him, whoever that is? Am I a pervert if I take her to the inn? AHHHH! Hyung-Seok, I am so going to slaughter youuuuuu!’

So poor Dong-Young’s first, and probably also the last, date ended in a complete devastation. All thanks to Hyung-Seok and the author of “The Midnight Drama by the Riverside of Han”, Dong-Young’s life had been completely ruined. He would very much likely live the rest of his life “all alone~ all alone~”. After all, life isn’t so “dramatic” as it can be in stories.


And what happened to Dong-Young afterwards? Well, to tell you the truth, nobody exactly knows. However, there are people who claim that they saw him heading towards a nearby inn, his unconscious girlfriend in his arms, desperately hoping he’d still be able to make a happy family with his angel.






Too bad.

NOTIFICATION: THE FOLLOWING STORY IS COMPLETELY FICTIONAL. THE CONTENT OF THE STORY ISN'T CONNECTED TO REALISTIC CHARACTERS, STORIES, OR SETTINGS WHATSOEVER. EVEN IF YOU DO FIND ANY RESEMBLANCE, IT'S MERELY YOUR IMAGINATION.





How to live fall in love in 90 seconds: http://pann.nate.com/video/213033879

Creative Writing Type-Up

Dozing in class should be tolerated. Furthermore, sleeping in class when the person is unable to resist the tyrannical snooze should be allowed, or even encouraged, to some degree. Because, you know, when you're sleepy, it's extremely difficult to shake off the drowsiness by yourself. It just has to go away, naturally. And until the unwanted guest leaves on his/her own, there is no way the host is going to return to his sober condition. Not only that, in the meantime that the person tries to break free from "sleep's control", he struggles without any progress, dissipating his time longer than he would have if only he had just taken a short 5-10 minutes of nap. So, like in times when it's simply impossible for you to not sleep, like in 8:30 in the morning or right after lunch, why not just take a short break to recover? A short break for every student is needed, especially to students who are engulfed from severe waves of homework, assignments, and responsibilities. The unfortunate part is that the adults even do not allow the tired students to rest "a bit". Reprimanding them for not paying attention to the class, the teachers close their hearts toward their students, forgetting their own experience of dozing off frequently in sleepy and silent libraries. Well, maybe the teachers do realize the fact that the students are under extreme stress and several tasks. However, they only care their students to "pay focus" to their "elaborately designed" classes. For students, rather than pleading students to stay awake, giving them 5-10 minutes of sleep and making them engage effectively in classes will be much beneficial for both students and teachers. Not only the teachers do not want the students to doze in their classes but also the students themselves do not like to sleep in classes. They regard sleeping in class as a clear evidence of being a bad student. Moreover, in a competitive atmospheres of school students cannot let themselves to lose their mind in class and lose the opportunity to take good notes that will help in their examinations. Take KMLA for example. Some classes in KMLA are extremely soporific to an extent in which most students faint. No one in his right mind would say that fainting in class is healthy. Limiting a nearly-fainting student from sleeping in class is an inhumane crime. It should most certainly be legally penalized and severely monitored. Apart from arguing whether or not dozing off in classes should be justified or allowed, we have to first consider whether dozing off in classes is student's fault. From recent research in Harvard Medical school, it is revealed that in certain environment, a bacteria named "Jol-Ryeu" can prosper, which is actually the cause of dozing off. Yes, you are not misheard, it is now revealed that bacteria is responsible for students' dozing off. This is totally a paradigm shift! Therefore, to repel the effect of the bacteria and increase productivity for students, we should sleep when we want to in class.

JESUS! Camp (Real Ver.)

The film “Jesus Camp” was quite an appalling film for me. Now, this was quite surprising, since I was usually unmoved with materials that chose “religion” as the theme of its content. Although I might provoke some pious believers, I must admit: I personally think religion is ridiculous. Because of their inherent irrationality and the mesmerization that they practice to their followers, religions-every single one of them-have always been my favorites to criticize about and my least favorites to advocate on. Just to go over a few quick points: the most representative teachings that many religions deploy to their followers include claims like “only the ones who believe in thou God shall be rescued” or “do not dare doubt or question the Creator, since he (or she) is always right, and it is best for us mortals to abide by his (or her) teachings and practice only benevolence”. My instant question: if the gods who are “supposedly in charge” of taking care of the poor mankind were so benevolent and magnanimous, why do they discriminate the people who follow them and who don’t? It seems pretty narrow-minded and mean for such “great beings” to only care for the ones who swore the pledge of allegiance to their rule. Furthermore, how are we supposed to know “what’s good” and “what’s bad”, since the vague concepts were never cleared up in the “sacred” Bible or in the “absolute” Koran? Is stealing a loaf of bread to feed the people who are starving a “good” act? Or not? What about killing a dictator who had the clear potential for slaughtering millions in the recent future? Is there a clear answer? Who’s to decide? And even if God (Jehovah, Allah, Buddha, or whoever)

were to evaluate somebody’s action, how are we supposed to know of his standards? What if what we had done with a good intention actually turned out to be something bad for many others? Are we guilty or not? And how can we know if we “don’t question or doubt” God’s thoughts? It all makes no sense. Absolutely no sense at all. And since the “perfect God” is supposed to make sense to us at all times, the contradiction that exists within religion (especially within Christianity) inevitably proves, ironically, that it is flawed. All forms of religions, without exceptions, are created by the people for the purpose to seek relaxation or even salvation by depending on some hypothetical, but ultimately superior, existence.
Well, that’s about it for my personal viewpoints on religion. And this disbelief was precisely the reason I was uninterested in materials that dealt with religion. However, “Jesus Camp” was an exception; despite my efforts to remain indifferent, the video startled me nonetheless. There were mainly two reasons that the documentary was so shocking: the “content” and the “director’s illustration of content”.
First and foremost, the most sensational factor of the video was, of course, its content. At first, when Mr. Garrioch had introduced the film as a nonfictional documentary demonstrating a camp for evangelist children, I’d thought it would be pretty interesting. I never knew that “Jesus Camp” was about to greatly surpass my expectations; what the video had contained was far more interesting than what I’d imagined-even horrible, to some extent. In the video, I saw the images of Becky Fischer, a woman around her fifties who was in charge of “Kids on Fire School Ministry Camp” (Jesus Camp), preaching in front of hundreds people, most of them children.

(Becky Fischer)

I witnessed her fervent speeches in which she commanded her audience to completely dedicate their lives to God, to fight against and repel whatever might be “influenced by the devil”, to sacrifice whatever they have for the “supposed will of God”, and finally, for heaven’s sake, to become “obedient soldiers” who comply with God’s orders; or, practically speaking, Becky’s orders. And this “stringent orders” were directly delivered to children-to 15, 10, and 7 year olds! During the interview she had done with the filmmakers, she commented that “I believe it is critical to properly educate our children to worship God and to devote themselves to the Christian cause. It’s what our loathe enemies, Islams do as well. Do I think that this is brainwashing? No, I think my children are ready for it. Others express their concerns on preaching to youngsters, but my youngsters can handle it.”

And the youngsters really could. They responded to Becky’s demands with absolute subordination and voluntary enthusiasm. When their teacher asked them to pray, the children held their hands up in the air, violently swirling them around along with passionate prayers to be connected with the “spirits”. When they were asked to give sermons in front of their peers, they transformed themselves into masterminds of Christianity, just like their teacher, and argued that “they are the selected generation of God and they have the duty to spread their beliefs to “sinful” others”. The kids in the Jesus Camp weren’t “kids”. They were zealots. Mentally armed, ardent, fanatic, and blindfolded zealots. Becky’s “education” to “train God’s potential army” was clearly successful; she had institutionalized brainwashing.

What was particularly so “remarkably terrifying” were the “techniques” Becky employed to achieve her goals. Yes, the realistic depictions of the camp were quite disgusting as well, but the most appealing substance was Becky’s genius. Her ingenious tactics to persuade the children was distinguishable from any plain sermon; she effectively addressed the ethos, pathos, and logos of the innocent minds.

Everybody could see that her dramatic preaching was directly appealing to the pathos of the children; the impressionable emotions of the little ones easily sympathized with Becky’s impassion. Furthermore, her entire campaign attracted the kids’ unsteadfast “ethos”. By “defining” everything related to the evangelist faith to be “good” and everything else to be “bad”, the camp manipulated its participants into thinking that whatever it tells them to do is “ethical”. And this method was extremely effective, especially since children in their puberty always try to behave and be “good boys and girls”. Since the youngsters desired to become nice and likable (which most children want to), guiding them to believe that upholding religious morality was the correct way to do so worked magically, showing critical effect. Lastly, Becky even employed tactics to logically persuade her students to conform to Christianity. In her lectures, she explained the reasons why “they must believe in Christ”, why “they’re so important to Christ”, and why “they must be ardent in doing so”. Using devils and hellfire as vivid imageries of the consequences that would penalize sinners in the end, Becky utilized her dexterous linguistic abilities to exaggerate the “logic” behind religious zealousness. So, in summary, Becky used her skillful tongue to seduce the young, by appealing to their emotions, ethics, and reasoning. And as it is clearly shown in the film, her strategies worked superbly.
However, it wasn’t only the “content” itself that made this documentary so sensational; it was also the way the director of this film so craftily led its viewers to obtain a negative impression about this camp, and moreover, evangelicalism and Christianity as a whole. Most of the people who watched the film would have been fully absorbed to the loathsome features of “Jesus Camp”, (like what I had done) and thus they wouldn’t have realized the bigger scheme that lay behind the shocking images. That was the filmmaker’s intention, which was to deliberately portray religion as something to be afraid and disgusted of.

(Rachel Grady)

The director of this documentary, Rachel Grady, purposefully chose “one of the most extreme cases that illustrates the distorted form of religious fervor”, chose the most “extremely malicious images” of the camp (Becky screaming her heads off, children crying insanely because of religious enlightenment, and other chaotic pictures overall), and intermittently inserted gruesome music and interviews that satirized the distorted versions of Christianity. Although I was personally against all the concepts Becky had proposed, (which was the reason why I was almost absorbed by the director’s message, like many others) I barely noticed in the end that my “ideas” despising religion were being strengthened and encouraged. That is when I realized this film was crafted and designed by Rachel’s strategies; her splendid strategies that produced the intended and maximized results. Of course, the response from the public was immense. The audience, including even the most renowned film critics, was enraged and flabbergasted at the malice of Becky and her camp. Some even left comments like “I couldn’t believe what I was witnessing”. Well, for me, that kind of made sense, since what Rachel disclosed to the public was the very extreme and perverted images of the truth, not authentic ones. I’m sure Becky was crazy to some degree, but I can say with almost absolute certainty that she wouldn’t have been THAT crazy as shown in the film. Same goes for the camp: I’m sure it was ludicrous, but not “sincerely terrible” as the director wanted her audience to believe. Of course many people couldn’t believe what they were seeing; it wasn’t the genuine version of the truth. The true mastermind in “The Jesus Camp” wasn’t Becky; it was Rachel, who edited the film to emphasize Becky as a mastermind. She adopted the exact same techniques to influence her viewers that Becky adopted to influence her students: by emotionally, morally, and logically demonstrating that “RELIGION IS BAD.”
All in all, I thought I had seen the model examples of “great, eloquent persuaders” after watching the “Jesus Camp”, although they had utilized their fantastic skills of persuasion for distorted purposes. The way the film-Becky and Rachel-struck me, or struck my sentiments, ethics, and rationality, was greatly shocking; enough for me to scream out loud “JESUS!”

Some Videos to Watch:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGceAojHR6o&noredirect=1
-->America's political commentator and stand-up comedian, Bill Maher discusses Jesus Camp from three different perspectives


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LACyLTsH4ac
-->Highlights of "Jesus Camp"